Well, friends, all that exercise does leave a body quite thirsty! The human doesn't call it exercise though. She really laughs when she puts an s in front of that word, cuz she says that's what I was doing. She even calls it my dirty weekend. Honestly! There's nothing dirty about, about, well, about the things that I was doing that a good ladycat doesn't talk about!
As you might have gathered, I'm home! The human came and got me very late Monday night so I couldn't write then, and yesterday Blogger wouldn't let her upload posts for some reason, so I'm sorry you've had to wait. Oh, I've missed you all so, so much! And I see my human has been causing mischief on here while I've been away. I've lost a commenter through it and everything. I've scolded her soundly, but she's asked me to reitterate to all involved that she really wasn't seeking to offend anyone or belittle their concern for rescue cats. She apologises all over again if it came across like she was doing that. I gave her a thwap just in case she did, whether she meant to or not! I also thwapped her for another reason, but I'll come to that in a minute. Let me tell you all about what happened.
It started innocently enough, well, innocent if you discount my mischief making. Do you remember us mentioning how disinterested I'd been in mancats this year? Except all of you out there, of course. Well, the human was watching and watching for the signs, so I thought I'd have a little fun with her. I started holding my tail a wee bit to one side. I gave her elevator bum when she stroked me. I even talked more to her and rolled around. I'd fooled her, and the very next day, she put me in the stinky PTU and took me to the house of a mancat. Except that it wasn't just one mancat! My friend lived with two other boys. They each had their own little house inside a bigger one. The human says that it was a big house divided into separate cat runs, all done so that everyone could see and talk to each other for company but not fight, but I say that my mancat owned his own house. It sounds better that way, doesn't it?
At the time, I didn't regard this upstart as my mancat, but just another idiot who wasn't going to milk and tuna me before he had his way! Every time he came close I spat at him and chased him off. I even thwapped him! The human left me there for two days, but I wasn't having any of it, and now that I'd had my fun with her, I wasn't holding my tail to one side or sticking my bum up either. She came to get me.
Now, as many of you will know, mancats who still have their manbits are very, very stinky. They spray a lot so that we ladycats can smell where they are and know they're interested in us. There were three boys in that house, and although they each had their own houses, I could still smell their stink. When I was at the show the week before, I was penned between two mancats who also made a stink for me. All that smell got me to thinking. I could have my pick of five boys, even though the one the human had chosen for me was the nicest. Five were interested in me. Wouldn't it be fun to make the other two that lived with my mancat jealous? If I was interested in him, wouldn't it make the other two work harder to get me, only to be disappointed? That's the way it should be, of course. Cat fans are just as important as judge fans! So, I set to work. I had a good bath (of my own design, not the human's). I made sure that I was extra floofy. Then I waited until Thursday night when the human was already super tired and needed a sleep before I showed my interest. I did this by making my own wee stink. I'm not as ill mannered as a mancat, so I only did this in my box. This had little effect on the sleeping human other than to make her mutter something about cystitis and a trip to the vet peoples. That was the last thing I wanted, so I upped my game. About once every second, I jumped on the bed, woke the human by shouting at her, then walked right across her and jumped down again. I was expecting her to jump up straight away and get me back to that mancat who I wanted badly now, but she slept on! It was only the next morning that she realised I was all the way interested, and even then, she didn't do the honourable thing and get me back up there.
The human says that you should always wait until the second or third day of a ladycat's interest, cuz that's when it's at its peak and she's most likely to let a strange male do the business. She made me wait, but I was so frantic that she didn't get hardly a wink of slepe Friday night. I even kept Dogman awake, and he was in another room with the door closed! It paid off though. First thing Saturday morning, I was put back in the PTU and taken to see my mancat. I was so desperate to get there that I didn't even sing on the way, except to call for him, of course.
But friends, when I got back, I had to put on a show. No self respecting ladycat would go willingly to a mancat, as he'd think he'd caught her too easily. In order to be appreciated, you must make them chase you and work hard, hard, hard to get you. It keeps their interest. So when he started to talk to me and be nice, when he came for a sniff and to make friends, I spat full in his face, then went right past him into his house, ate his food and did my own smelly spray right over his in his box. I was telling him that I was boss, and he'd better remember! The people that he owns said that he's very quick to get girls, and that he was already pacing behind me just waiting for his chance. When I heard this, I turned round quicker than you can say catnip and thwapped him good!
Even after the human left I continued this behaviour. It was worrying his people, and she said she didn't think i'd ever manage to be caught, but I knew better. Later that evening, when he was practically begging me to make friends and the other two boys were drooling with jealousy, I went in the box just to make it mine again, and when I came out, I allowed him to catch me. I put up a fight just to keep up the facade. I pretended I didn't see him sneaking up behind me, and when he got me, I struggled. He's much bigger than me though, so even if I hadn't wanted to be caught, I'd have had a hard time getting away. I'd positioned myself so that the other boys could watch and go green with envy that their friend had got such a catch, and then I let him get on with it.
Well, all that posturing worked, let me tell you. To say he appreciated me would be a grosse understatement. I also don't mind admitting that I appreciated him too. I did so several times over the next few days, actually, so many that I lost count. At one point we were just doing it for the fun of it. The people that he owns told the human she didn't think we were doing it for real cuz I didn't scream or roll, two classic signs that mating has been successful, but I just lay there and enjoyed it for a full ten minutes while they talked on the phone. i'm not telling whether it was for real or not, but when we were done, we both washed up as though it were. The human's friends say that some of their cats never screamed either, so who knows! I just didn't want to waste energy on screaming that time. What's the point when I could save it for some more appreciation? I did scream quite a few times when he was finished, partly to make sure the human knew that there were successful matings, but mostly because that pig of a mancat was leaving me after he'd had his jollies when I wasn't ready for it to be done yet! On the bright side though, he didn't stay away for too long.
When the human came to get me, she said I'd lost weight, and the other people told her that was normal after all the exercise I'd been getting. I stuffed my face when I got home, but not before I thwapped that human. When she came to get me, I wasn't quite done with my fun. She'd asked the people to separate us earlier that morning. She says that if you allow cats to mate for more than two days, it makes prediction of the date of kittening very difficult and this could lead to dangers for me if babies are left inside for too long, or if they're removed too early due to mis-calculation. She didn't come for me until that evening, so all that day I could see my mancat, but couldn't get to him. I called and called. He called and called, but that heartless people wouldn't let us together. When the human came, she took my mancat out for a cuddle and to say thank you. She put him down on his bed, and I sprang at the chance. That was a bit I could get to, so I jumped up beside him. This was to see him and make a fuss of the human, who I actuallly kinda missed. He showed her just how much he loved me. he was washing my face and everything while the human cuddled us both. The people says I was one of his favourite girls. He usually gets bored and won't do any more exercise after two days exactly, but not so with me! In fact, the human says if she hadn't been quick, we'd have mated again while she was there!
So when she put me in that horrid PTU, when she took me out of his house and put me in the car, I was less than pleased. I huffed the whole way home with her. I wouldn't speak to her. I didn't even sleep with her that night. I thwapped her to tell her that I wanted my mancat back, but she wasn't having any of it.
But friends, romance is short lived. The next morning, I crawled up in her lap for a cuddle. Mancats might be for weekends, but humans are a lifelong responsibility, and I made sure to tell her that I forgave her. I've been snuggling her ever since, oh, and washing the mancat wee smell off me. Even though he didn't wee on me, just being in his home made my furr all stink! The human encourages this. She says she'll give me a bath, but not yet. Not for a few days until I'm totally comfortable at home again. She says she might not even do it if I wash up good, cuz she doesn't want to stress me at all while I might be carrying babies in my tummy.
To answer a question, I don't know yet, Clowder. It will take three weeks from the first day of mating before I show any signs, and even then, the human may not be able to tell, which will necessitate a trip to the vet. My nipples will get larger and turn a very rosey pink colour, and the hair around them will thin out a bit. The human says the waiting is killing her. I'm not bothered though. We cats know the merrits of living each day for itself, do we not? And on the bright side, if there aren't any babies there, I can go back and see my lovely mancat again!
I will keep you updated on any progress made, have no fear!
To end, I would like to extend my well wishes to Paula, and my sorrow at losing a dear friend, Sweet Praline
She was one of the sweetest friends on the CB. If you haven't already done so, please stop by and let her know how much she was loved. Me and the human know she will be happier now, in no more pain, but it doesn't make dicisions here on earth any easier. We both send Paula as much strength and love as we can muster... And that's a lot! Sweet Praline was a true tortie right to the end, spitting at the vet people as he helped her pass peacefully with the needle. What a show of tortitude! I am proud to share colours with her!
Until next time, friends. Remind your peoples where that tuna is!
Showing posts with label ptu. Show all posts
Showing posts with label ptu. Show all posts
Thursday, 28 April 2011
Wednesday, 2 February 2011
Wordy Wednesday: Review Time!
Finally, I get my own blog back! To write about me, and nothing but me! What's that, human? We're going to do a review? That you need to write most of because your opinion will matter to any peoples thinking about buying the thing we're going to review? This is outrageous! Honestly, this is my blog, nobody else's!
That', friends, was the conversation I had with that blog-hogging human of mine just before I started to write this. Now, given that she has the thumbs, and thumbs are necessary for opening and feeding stinky goodness, I am forced to admit the necessity for compromise with her sometimes. In light of this, I have decided that it is permissible for her to review products alongside me. She can write her thoughts at the beginning, and then I'll finish up with the important stuff. I can live with that.
I've been mentioning for some time now the smart new PTU the human got bought for her Birthday. I used it to go on that long, loooooong train journey to Oxford a few weeks ago, but sadly, friends, I'll be using it again tomorrow. The human has to go up there for yet more paperwork related to her job, the new one that is, so again, I get to travel. I'm half pleased by this, and half annoyed too. On the one paw, I do quite like to go adventuring, but on the other, it's such a drag to be stuck in a PTU for any length of time. I thought I'd better get my unbiased review of it up here before I'm forced to use it tomorrow, cuz you can be sure that once I've been in there, I'll have nothing good at all to say about it! Right, here goes. Human first, and then me.
The Outward Hound Backpack Carrier for Cats and Small Dogs
is exactly what you'd think it is by the name. In short, it is a carrier that straps to a human's back, enabling you to carry your pet and still have both hands free for the important tasks of, say, dragging your two ton suitcase full of cat stuff and perhaps a single change of clothes for you which had to be crammed in the very top due to space restrictions. Can you tell I'm bitter?
At first glance, I didn't like this carrier at all. It's made from canvas which feels rather like the stuff used to make those ghastly cheap sports bags that you used to take to physical education at school. Well, I did. It comes flat-packed, and is held together by zips alone. The two end pannels have a reinforced frame, and it is this that gives the bag its shape. Once the zips are done up, you're presented with a rectangle. The bottom has a solid board type pad in there so that the bag doesn't sag in the middle with the weight of your pet, and there's a thinner version of this against the wearer's back, again I presume to make sure the bag doesn't bow. The front of the bag (if you look at it with the backpack straps facing away from you) is pretty soft, but is held quite nicely by the tension on the zips and by a very thin metal bar which passes through the material from one side to the other (i.e, from end to end of the bag). The top, however, has no reinforcement at all, and does sag quite badly. This wouldn't be an inconvenience to most animals, but Tia hates material touching her head, so I found myself constantly having to pull it up for her. The top does have a mesh window in it so that they can see out, but if they don't want things touching their head, they're unlikely to turn their face upwards, as the material would then sag onto it.
The straps themselves are fairly adjustable, but not to the point where a very large person could wear the pack easily, unless it rode very high up on the shoulders. They have a thin padding in them which I thought would be hell on my shoulders, but surprisingly, it holds up remarkably well and is very comfy when worn. Leading from the upper part of the strap and attaching to that thin metal bar I spoke about earlier is an adjustable section of webbing strap. This is supposed to put tension on the carrier as you stand so that the bottom stays horizontal whether you're standing or sitting. However, I found that, not only did the clips let the tension slip as you walked, but when the straps were pulled tight, it also narrowed the carrier's width, due to all of the pressure being taken through that bar, which naturally travelled forward, i.e, closer to the wearer's back, to equalise the pressure. tia didn't seem to mind this though.
The size of the carrier itself is quite small. I wouldn't put a pet of more than about 12lb or so in here. Any bigger and I suspect they'd be squashed and uncomfortable. Tia weighs about9 lb, probably just slightly under, and even at her size, I was reluctant to keep her in there longer than necessary. They have enough room to lie, sit, and probably just about stand, and they can actually turn around in it, but due to the narrow width, this latter is a bit of an effort.
The carrier has a rigid pad in the bottom. This is totally removable, and fixes to the bottom of the carrier with velcro. It is also washable which is ideal if your cat has an accident. However, if they do, chances are that it'll run over the sides of the pat and into the underneath of the bag, so be prepared to scrub in there too. Although it's very good at stopping the bag from sagging under weight, it isn't very comfy, and its surface doesn't provide good purchase for paws. I padded mine out with a puppy pad which has the added bonus of being able to soak up nasty accidents too. Tia seemed to think this was comfy enough for her, and the pads provide extra grip for a pet's feet.
The bag has two straps which are held together by a handle in the middle. This can be used to carry the bag exactly like a holdall. When you do this, it's surprisingly light and easy to hold onto, and even when carried like this, it doesn't sway half as much as plastic carriers do, so your pet will still be comfortable. The Outward Hound is well ventilated, having a mesh pannel at either end, and a mesh window in the top. The top window can be unzipped so that you can put your hand in and give reassurance, and also so that the cat or dog can ride in the carrier with its head outside, looking at the world. The opening is quite large, so if you're going to use this, you need to ensure that the cat or dog is securely fastened to the clip inside the carrier to prevent a wriggling escape through the open window. This is located at the end of another long piece of webbing strap, and will snap securely to a harness or collar. It poses a problem when not in use, as it does swing about quite a lot inside the carrier, but I fed mine through one of the supporting zips so that it was on the outside. It kept it out of the way and didn't compromise the bag's functionality.
The only entrance provided is a side one. This is an arched opening in one end of the carrier that unzips completely. Its top half is the mesh portion, and the bottom is canvas. If your cat goes star-shaped, you're never going to get them into this carrier. You could try putting them through the top window. The opening is big enough, but I must state that this isn't what it's designed for. Tia had to be pushed into this carrier, but she has to be with any with a side opening, so that's not out of the ordinary.
To summarise:
Cons: small size, possible escape ability through top hatch, sagging top pannel, inadequate tension straps, not fully adjustable, side opening only, hard, uncomfortable bottom pad, no ability to secure privacy for the animal as mesh windows cannot be covered, no ability to give food or water, accidents will run into the interior of the bag.
Pros: Versatility, strength (even with tia clawing it, the canvas didn't even scratch, let alone rip), top pannel means easy viewing of pet, integrated restraint clip, flat-packs for storage, ventilation, comfortable straps, ability to carry in two different ways, very light.
As I say, I didn't like this bag when I first got it, but the more I use it, the more I come to appreciate its good points. It does have its bad ones, but it does a good enough job to be acceptable. I'd love to compare this with the Sherpa backpacks, but they're unavailable in the UK. If you need a backpack carrier, this one will do the job reasonably well.
Before I begin, I need to tell you that I hate PTUs. They're horrible, nasty, confining, stupid, nasty things. Have I said nasty yet? So whatever good points I make about this, it doesn't mean that I like it or wish to go in it more than is absolutely necessary.
This was unlike any PTU I'd ever been in before, and I wasn't sure about it for many, many days. The human bribed me in there with treats, and I got very practiced about darting in, nicking the treat and then hightailing it back out of there before the scary monster that it was could gobble me up. Over time though, I got more confident. it hadn't gobbled me all the other times before, so I gradually got slower and slower until I'd happily stand in there until the human was finished handing out the yummies. Initially, she zipped me up and took me for only short walks round the house where I let her live, and that, while not fun, was Ok. It's a different way of being carried. You're much higher up for one thing, and for another, you don't bump and sway half as much as before, cuz you're held quite snugly against the human's back. The one thing I didn't like about this was that I couldn't see my human when she was carrying me. I'm big on this. I never like letting her out of my sight, and I do get quite upset when she disappears on me, but I could still hear her voice.
As the human mentioned, I don't like things touching my head. The bit at the top rested there, no matter what way I twisted and turned, and at first, that's zactly what i did. I used my claws to try and dig my way out, but the PTU was too strong for me. I jumped, but the soft thing only bonked me on the head. Even when we got on the train, I still did my impression of a break-dancer as I tried to find an escape route. Even the mesh, the thinnest and most likely part to provide my escape, wasn't giving in to my attack. Eventually I gave up, ahem, I mean I rested for a while before launchinc my next assault.
This PTU is too small for my liking. Instead of stretching in a full-length sprawl for a quick bit of shut-eye, I had to do it in a tight ball. I couldn't jump as high as I wanted to, and even if I'd wanted them, there wouldn't have been much room for ping pong balls, mr mousey and my tuna. I made the humen pack them in the suitcase instead.
The PTU also smelled funny. The human had to leave it out for days to get the new, factory stink out, and the old familiar house stink in. It's still not completely gone though.
The human put the cat pad (I refuse to call it puppy pad) in the bottom, and with this in there, I found it adequate enough for my bones to rest on. It has lots of windows, so when we were walking down the platform, lots of peoples got to admire me. They see me easier cuz I'm high up and can be viewed from three different angles. They enjoyed talking to me and I enjoyed singing my best opera to them which, thanks to the mesh, they could hear very, very clearly. I could also survey my new domain from any angle I chose to. That's gotta be a bonus! There was plenty to watch as we travelled, and I have to admit, it got quite interesting at times! It's good to have this mesh up, cuz peoples can get close without actually touching me. I like it this way.
So that's all I have to say about it. It's as stinky as any PTU, and will be even more stinky soon cuz I'll be forced to go in it again! I hate tomorrow already! I'll like it when I get to Dogman's but right now, I hate it! Please note that I am taking requests for my programme of songs tomorrow. Get 'em in early, folks.
That', friends, was the conversation I had with that blog-hogging human of mine just before I started to write this. Now, given that she has the thumbs, and thumbs are necessary for opening and feeding stinky goodness, I am forced to admit the necessity for compromise with her sometimes. In light of this, I have decided that it is permissible for her to review products alongside me. She can write her thoughts at the beginning, and then I'll finish up with the important stuff. I can live with that.
I've been mentioning for some time now the smart new PTU the human got bought for her Birthday. I used it to go on that long, loooooong train journey to Oxford a few weeks ago, but sadly, friends, I'll be using it again tomorrow. The human has to go up there for yet more paperwork related to her job, the new one that is, so again, I get to travel. I'm half pleased by this, and half annoyed too. On the one paw, I do quite like to go adventuring, but on the other, it's such a drag to be stuck in a PTU for any length of time. I thought I'd better get my unbiased review of it up here before I'm forced to use it tomorrow, cuz you can be sure that once I've been in there, I'll have nothing good at all to say about it! Right, here goes. Human first, and then me.
Review: Outward Hound Backpack Carrier
The Outward Hound Backpack Carrier for Cats and Small Dogs
is exactly what you'd think it is by the name. In short, it is a carrier that straps to a human's back, enabling you to carry your pet and still have both hands free for the important tasks of, say, dragging your two ton suitcase full of cat stuff and perhaps a single change of clothes for you which had to be crammed in the very top due to space restrictions. Can you tell I'm bitter?
At first glance, I didn't like this carrier at all. It's made from canvas which feels rather like the stuff used to make those ghastly cheap sports bags that you used to take to physical education at school. Well, I did. It comes flat-packed, and is held together by zips alone. The two end pannels have a reinforced frame, and it is this that gives the bag its shape. Once the zips are done up, you're presented with a rectangle. The bottom has a solid board type pad in there so that the bag doesn't sag in the middle with the weight of your pet, and there's a thinner version of this against the wearer's back, again I presume to make sure the bag doesn't bow. The front of the bag (if you look at it with the backpack straps facing away from you) is pretty soft, but is held quite nicely by the tension on the zips and by a very thin metal bar which passes through the material from one side to the other (i.e, from end to end of the bag). The top, however, has no reinforcement at all, and does sag quite badly. This wouldn't be an inconvenience to most animals, but Tia hates material touching her head, so I found myself constantly having to pull it up for her. The top does have a mesh window in it so that they can see out, but if they don't want things touching their head, they're unlikely to turn their face upwards, as the material would then sag onto it.
The straps themselves are fairly adjustable, but not to the point where a very large person could wear the pack easily, unless it rode very high up on the shoulders. They have a thin padding in them which I thought would be hell on my shoulders, but surprisingly, it holds up remarkably well and is very comfy when worn. Leading from the upper part of the strap and attaching to that thin metal bar I spoke about earlier is an adjustable section of webbing strap. This is supposed to put tension on the carrier as you stand so that the bottom stays horizontal whether you're standing or sitting. However, I found that, not only did the clips let the tension slip as you walked, but when the straps were pulled tight, it also narrowed the carrier's width, due to all of the pressure being taken through that bar, which naturally travelled forward, i.e, closer to the wearer's back, to equalise the pressure. tia didn't seem to mind this though.
The size of the carrier itself is quite small. I wouldn't put a pet of more than about 12lb or so in here. Any bigger and I suspect they'd be squashed and uncomfortable. Tia weighs about9 lb, probably just slightly under, and even at her size, I was reluctant to keep her in there longer than necessary. They have enough room to lie, sit, and probably just about stand, and they can actually turn around in it, but due to the narrow width, this latter is a bit of an effort.
The carrier has a rigid pad in the bottom. This is totally removable, and fixes to the bottom of the carrier with velcro. It is also washable which is ideal if your cat has an accident. However, if they do, chances are that it'll run over the sides of the pat and into the underneath of the bag, so be prepared to scrub in there too. Although it's very good at stopping the bag from sagging under weight, it isn't very comfy, and its surface doesn't provide good purchase for paws. I padded mine out with a puppy pad which has the added bonus of being able to soak up nasty accidents too. Tia seemed to think this was comfy enough for her, and the pads provide extra grip for a pet's feet.
The bag has two straps which are held together by a handle in the middle. This can be used to carry the bag exactly like a holdall. When you do this, it's surprisingly light and easy to hold onto, and even when carried like this, it doesn't sway half as much as plastic carriers do, so your pet will still be comfortable. The Outward Hound is well ventilated, having a mesh pannel at either end, and a mesh window in the top. The top window can be unzipped so that you can put your hand in and give reassurance, and also so that the cat or dog can ride in the carrier with its head outside, looking at the world. The opening is quite large, so if you're going to use this, you need to ensure that the cat or dog is securely fastened to the clip inside the carrier to prevent a wriggling escape through the open window. This is located at the end of another long piece of webbing strap, and will snap securely to a harness or collar. It poses a problem when not in use, as it does swing about quite a lot inside the carrier, but I fed mine through one of the supporting zips so that it was on the outside. It kept it out of the way and didn't compromise the bag's functionality.
The only entrance provided is a side one. This is an arched opening in one end of the carrier that unzips completely. Its top half is the mesh portion, and the bottom is canvas. If your cat goes star-shaped, you're never going to get them into this carrier. You could try putting them through the top window. The opening is big enough, but I must state that this isn't what it's designed for. Tia had to be pushed into this carrier, but she has to be with any with a side opening, so that's not out of the ordinary.
To summarise:
Cons: small size, possible escape ability through top hatch, sagging top pannel, inadequate tension straps, not fully adjustable, side opening only, hard, uncomfortable bottom pad, no ability to secure privacy for the animal as mesh windows cannot be covered, no ability to give food or water, accidents will run into the interior of the bag.
Pros: Versatility, strength (even with tia clawing it, the canvas didn't even scratch, let alone rip), top pannel means easy viewing of pet, integrated restraint clip, flat-packs for storage, ventilation, comfortable straps, ability to carry in two different ways, very light.
As I say, I didn't like this bag when I first got it, but the more I use it, the more I come to appreciate its good points. It does have its bad ones, but it does a good enough job to be acceptable. I'd love to compare this with the Sherpa backpacks, but they're unavailable in the UK. If you need a backpack carrier, this one will do the job reasonably well.
Outward Hound PTU Review by Tia
Before I begin, I need to tell you that I hate PTUs. They're horrible, nasty, confining, stupid, nasty things. Have I said nasty yet? So whatever good points I make about this, it doesn't mean that I like it or wish to go in it more than is absolutely necessary.
This was unlike any PTU I'd ever been in before, and I wasn't sure about it for many, many days. The human bribed me in there with treats, and I got very practiced about darting in, nicking the treat and then hightailing it back out of there before the scary monster that it was could gobble me up. Over time though, I got more confident. it hadn't gobbled me all the other times before, so I gradually got slower and slower until I'd happily stand in there until the human was finished handing out the yummies. Initially, she zipped me up and took me for only short walks round the house where I let her live, and that, while not fun, was Ok. It's a different way of being carried. You're much higher up for one thing, and for another, you don't bump and sway half as much as before, cuz you're held quite snugly against the human's back. The one thing I didn't like about this was that I couldn't see my human when she was carrying me. I'm big on this. I never like letting her out of my sight, and I do get quite upset when she disappears on me, but I could still hear her voice.
As the human mentioned, I don't like things touching my head. The bit at the top rested there, no matter what way I twisted and turned, and at first, that's zactly what i did. I used my claws to try and dig my way out, but the PTU was too strong for me. I jumped, but the soft thing only bonked me on the head. Even when we got on the train, I still did my impression of a break-dancer as I tried to find an escape route. Even the mesh, the thinnest and most likely part to provide my escape, wasn't giving in to my attack. Eventually I gave up, ahem, I mean I rested for a while before launchinc my next assault.
This PTU is too small for my liking. Instead of stretching in a full-length sprawl for a quick bit of shut-eye, I had to do it in a tight ball. I couldn't jump as high as I wanted to, and even if I'd wanted them, there wouldn't have been much room for ping pong balls, mr mousey and my tuna. I made the humen pack them in the suitcase instead.
The PTU also smelled funny. The human had to leave it out for days to get the new, factory stink out, and the old familiar house stink in. It's still not completely gone though.
The human put the cat pad (I refuse to call it puppy pad) in the bottom, and with this in there, I found it adequate enough for my bones to rest on. It has lots of windows, so when we were walking down the platform, lots of peoples got to admire me. They see me easier cuz I'm high up and can be viewed from three different angles. They enjoyed talking to me and I enjoyed singing my best opera to them which, thanks to the mesh, they could hear very, very clearly. I could also survey my new domain from any angle I chose to. That's gotta be a bonus! There was plenty to watch as we travelled, and I have to admit, it got quite interesting at times! It's good to have this mesh up, cuz peoples can get close without actually touching me. I like it this way.
So that's all I have to say about it. It's as stinky as any PTU, and will be even more stinky soon cuz I'll be forced to go in it again! I hate tomorrow already! I'll like it when I get to Dogman's but right now, I hate it! Please note that I am taking requests for my programme of songs tomorrow. Get 'em in early, folks.
Monday, 24 January 2011
Mish-Mash
I couldn't think of a better title for today's post, because it is a bit if a mish-mash of lots of different things. Do you realise that I haven't blogged for almost a week? I do, and boy did I make sure the human did too! I mean, it's one thing her not writing for me for a day or two, but almost a week? It's punishable! That being said though, I suppose I should go a little easy on her. She did have the funeral, after all, and all the travelling and the teaching, and, well, you get the picture. But while she was off doing her stuff, I was doing mine. I'll mish-mash the two and tell you all about it. Let's start with travelling.
I mentioned that we'd be taking a long journey to get to Dogman's house, but I wasn't really prepared for how long it was, nor the human's reaction to it. She'd done a full day at the work hunt, and as I've mentioned before, when this happens, she's super tired when she gets home. she usually has what Bug calls a surprise nap somewhere in the middle of the evening, but of course, she couldn't do that on Wednesday, cuz we had to go on the journey. I don't know if I said that my walking jacket and backpack carrier arrived, but they did, so we had a chance to test them. The human had even put a special pad in the bottom so that if I had to do a peepee again, I wouldn't be embarrassed or upset cuz it would soak it all up. I'll tell you now that I didn't need to use it!
Now, you know my views on PTUs, whether they're super smart backpack ones, or boring old plastic ones. I don't like 'em. In fact, I hate 'em, and I don't keep my thoughts to myself. On the bright side, it does give me the opportunity to perfect some of the more challenging arias around, but the human never seems to appreciate it. Now, I do plan to do a review of the PTU, as does my human, so I won't say too much about it here except that it certainly gets me noticed! I had lots of peoples making those stupid cooing baby talk noises through the windows of the PTU at me as my human took me along the platform to the train. I, of course, sang to them in my loudest, strongest voice, which in turn got more of them staring at me. The human got quite embarrassed by the end, although I really don't know why.
We had to spend four hours on the train, but the human had anticipated this. She knew that if she took me out of the PTU, I would know that song practice had come to an end and I could relax until the next time I had to change trains. Now this is good human training. Why? Cuz she took me out of the PTU and kept me out. She put my walking jacket on me which is also super smart, attached a leash, then let me lounge at my leisure on her knee. Again, peoples seemed very interested in me. They said they'd never seen a ladycat on a train before, and especially not one who sat so good and quiet and who wore a smart jacket. I, of course, showed off to my adoring public, but I didn't let them touch me. I don't like it when hands come out of nowhere to try and stroke my beautiful furs. I mean, can you imagine all the cleaning you have to do to get their people stink out of a long, fluffy coat? It's disgusting!
Now I mentioned that the human was tired, but she took that to new levels on the train. Instead of paying me attention, she leaned back in her seat, fixed my lead round her upper arm so that I couldn't run off (as if I would!), then drifted off to sleep! This had me quite alarmed. It's all very well her having a surprise nap on the sofa at home, but on a train? What if we missed our stop! I knew something had to be done. Accordingly, I went into action. I stood up, stretched, climbed the human's tummy, stood on her chest and began to shout in her face and knead for all I was worth. This caused some peoples to laugh, but I wasn't paying them any attention. The human still didn't wake! I decided that it would be fun to try and get in the neck of her top. It was low already, and my kneading had made it drop a little further. Peoples are sensible in one regard. They don't like other peoples to see their poor, bald, hairless skin, so I knew that if she felt the neckline of the top move, she'd be awake in a flash. I had one and a half front paws in there when she jumped awake, pulled me out and fixed her clothing up again. Hah, victory was mine! As soon as she opened her eyes, I miaowed sweetly, gave her finger a little kissie as a reward, and went on kneading. She was cross, but ended up just laughing and giving me a cuddle. Good human!
When we arrived at the last train station, Dogman and Mark were there to meet us. Mark has a pet name for me that he uses as a joke. He calls me cooking fat, something that the human and Dogman find really funny when Mark explained that it made two kind of different words if you changed the first letters around. Mark pretends he doesn't like cats, but I know this is his way of showing that he really does like me, cuz when he says it, he usually gives me a sneaky cuddle. The human has caught him at it. Plus, he doesn't complain when I get out of the PTU in his car, nor when I sing to him. In fact, he's more sympathetic than the human! Add to this that this washis daddypeople's pretend name for one of their old pet cats that Mark loved very, very much, and I take it as a compliment. it would be bad if he really meant those other words that it makeswhen you change the letters around, but we're certain he doesn't. He just likes the play on words, and the fact that it makes peoples ask why he's calling me cooking fat. I think it's just as good as Dogman's song for me. I got to sit on
Dogman's knee on the drive home, and he and Mark practiced their miaowing for part of the
journey. They thought it was really funny that I kept miaowing back to them, but really, I was
only giving them language lessons. I was teaching them propper pronunciation, you know.
I didn't take long to settle in. I'd only been gone a few weeks, after all. Dogface was there.
I tolerated her, even when she jumped all over the human to say hello. Honestly, she has no
reservations at all, that mutt!
I slept good that night. So did the human, despite her surprise nap. The next day, she left
early in the morning. Dogman had an appointment at the eye hospital which she attended with him
in a professional capacity. Mark came and took them, but they left Dogface behind! When they came
home again, they had warm chicken with them, but they wouldn't let me have any! Shortly after
that, the human gave me a cuddle and explained that she would be leaving me for the night to go
and teach with Dogman in another far away place, and off she went. I didn't mind at all. As I've
said before, I kinda like Mark, and I know he likes me. I played the "attack the people feet
under the covers" game with him when he went to bed... All night long! If his shouting was
anything to go by, he enjoyed it a lot. I also played ping pong in the middle of the night, and
when I visited the litter tray, I came in and sang to him of my doings. Again, his talk noise,
lots of it, sounded as though he liked the fact that I kept waking him up. He was so pleased that
he was still talking about it when the human came back the next day!
She came back without Dogman. He was at his grandad's funeral, and the plan was that the human
would come home and look after Dogface and the little kittenpeoples who are Dogman's nephews, so
that the big ones could all go to the funeral. Well, the little peoples didn't turn up, and
apparently they all went with their mummypeople, so the human used the opportunity to head off
with Mark and finalise the paperwork for her new job. Yes, friends, there was more of it to be
done! They left me behind again... Starting to sense a pattern here, are you?
To take a side tangent for a moment, I heard the human mention last week how cute purr-miaows
are. To illustrate, I'll post a Youtube video, or I will when the human gets home from the work
hunt, as she's not allowed to access Youtube in work. Well, I took this comment of hers to heart,
and while she was gone on Thursday, I got to practicing. When I got hold of her on Friday, i
climbed all over her and purr-miaowed my heart out! I do like to please her from time to time,
mainly cuz i know that it often leads to tuna, but still. It got me extra cuddles, and she
started saying how much I reminded her of Mummycat, who also used to do that. She remarked on how
odd it was, cuz I've only rarely purr-miaowed for her before, but over the weekend, I was doing
it all the time. Well, if you say a thing, you gotta expect me to pick up on it!
Anyway, Saturday they all went off out again, and when the human came back, she was cold and
tired. They said they went out to look at stuff. Nothing really exciting happened that day,
except for something really, really huge! I'll leave it till the end of the post though, cuz it's
real big news, or at least, it is for us.
Yesterday, it was time to go back in the stinky PTU again to get on the train, but this time,
I'd had enough, and boy did I shout! It was so bad that the human actually thought I'd peepeed
again, but of course, I hadn't. I mean, what self-respecting ladycat would peepee in her own PTU? Last time wasn't my fault. I was calling for a mancat, and you gotta peepee more when you're like that. I couldn't help it! I was just sick of being stuffed in that thing! Even when she took me out on the train, I carried on shouting. I made her embarrassed all over again, but you know what? I didn't care! She said it was the longest few hours of her life, and she wishes I had an off button. It did get me plenty of attention though. Because of my smart jacket, one little girl even thought I might be a guide cat, cuz it was kinda like the thing Dogface used to wear when she was a guide dog, only mine was a lot nicer of course. I did settle down eventually, but I still wasn't happy, and I kept letting her know with grumbles from time to time.
We got back pretty late last night. All I wanted to do was eat, and all she wanted to do was sleep, but she had to have a shower and do some washing and make the bed and unpack her suitcase, and even make phone calls. It was Bug's step-dad's birthday yesterday, and it was the birthday of the middle humankitten that lives with Phoebe, so she called them to say hi. She also called Bug, but almost fell asleep on the phone with him. I was helping though. She can't stay awake when I cuddle her tummy, which I was doing last night.
Boy, it's good to be home again! I like travelling, but there's a lot of moving around involved in it, and it becomes a bit tiresome from time to time. The human says I tolerate it well, and so I do. I don't get worried or stressed in new places so long as the human is around, so she feels worse about leaving me behind when she goes places when compared to taking me with her. I'm happy to keep it this way. I like seeing new bits of the world.
But now, on to the big, big news. You remember I mentioned a while back that I would hopefully be having kittens? Well, the human, as you know, calls herself a breeder. However, as we've mentioned, she loves all her cats so much that we are members of the family first and foremost. As her breeding gets more serious though, she knows that other members will be added to our family. Now, she's of the opinion that all those living in a household should like each other and get along, but she also knows that when a mummycat is allowed to keep a kitten with her, they tend to be very exclusive with one another and pretty much ignore others, if they're closely bonded, that is. When you have a bonded group of two cats, it makes it easier for them to shun the rest. But of course, if she is to continue breeding, then some of our kittens will have to stay with us, right? This posed a lot of problems, as she didn't want to create little isolated groups of cats in the house, but what to do?
Well, it just so happens that both Dogman and Dogman's niece and even her mummypeople are all wanting a Persian cat. Isn't that great? Dogman has been thinking about it for some time. He loves me, but he had a real soft spot for mummycat which has never really gone away. He says he's been fighting with himself not to get one, but since I've been staying with him, he says he really misses me when I'm not around. His niece has wanted a Persian for years, as has her mummypeople who she doesn't live with any more. This is excellent news for me, and for the human. For me, cuz my kittens, well three of them at least, are guaranteed to find super duper homes and stay close enough that we can both go visit them if we like.
The human had a conversation with Dogman and the niece and explained the problems she foresaw. Both of them seemed thrilled, and she couldn't work out why until they made it clear. Many peoples believe that an animal must have a litter in order for maturation to be complete. I tend to agree in part myself, cuz I know that I'm missing out on something, something that my mummycat had, and all the others who had kittens had. On the other hand, if there aren't good homes for kittens, then it's irresponsible to bring babies into the world. Anyway, enough on that. So ideally, Dogman and the niece wanted their cats to have at least one litter of kittens before they got their ladygardenectomies. This suited the human just fine, cuz it means that she can have a kitten from one or both of the litters, and bring them into our house. As we won't be mummycat and daughters, it means that they will be treated as any other cat would. Sure we might bond, but it's unlikely to be as close as that of mummycat and daughter, so it still leaves room for the other cats in the house. So the human has agreed that, as long as they will let her have the first litter, she will give them each a kitten, and handle all the hard parts of the breeding herself like the birth, the stud, the mating. It also means that her programme progresses much more quickly. Realistically, if I have kittens this year and even one of them is a keeper, she can be on the third generation of her breeding programme within a year. This allows her to establish her lines very quickly, and to make sure that, not only does she have the best, most healthy and beautiful ladycats for breeding, but that her kittens find really good homes. As we've said before, Dogface couldn't have found a better home with Dogman, and even with me she
has to tell him off for spoiling me too much... He gives me whole tins of tuna, not just portions! I like his niece too. She talks real nice to me and she even brushed me too and gave me good chin tickles. She looks after Dogface sometimes too, and she loves her.
Wow, wasn't that a long post? I told you a lot had happened! I'm sorry that I haven't been round to visit you others. The human says she will try to do it at some point today, but she's still trying to catch up on washing and work hunting, as she did have two days off last week and there's a lot needing doing! I will help her by lying on the keyboard, headbutting her right when she's trying to concentrate, and crawling on her to force her to turn away from the computer. I will also do my impression of a cat statue in repose on top of the clean, cat-hair and wrinkle free ironing. I hope she appreciates my hard work!
I mentioned that we'd be taking a long journey to get to Dogman's house, but I wasn't really prepared for how long it was, nor the human's reaction to it. She'd done a full day at the work hunt, and as I've mentioned before, when this happens, she's super tired when she gets home. she usually has what Bug calls a surprise nap somewhere in the middle of the evening, but of course, she couldn't do that on Wednesday, cuz we had to go on the journey. I don't know if I said that my walking jacket and backpack carrier arrived, but they did, so we had a chance to test them. The human had even put a special pad in the bottom so that if I had to do a peepee again, I wouldn't be embarrassed or upset cuz it would soak it all up. I'll tell you now that I didn't need to use it!
Now, you know my views on PTUs, whether they're super smart backpack ones, or boring old plastic ones. I don't like 'em. In fact, I hate 'em, and I don't keep my thoughts to myself. On the bright side, it does give me the opportunity to perfect some of the more challenging arias around, but the human never seems to appreciate it. Now, I do plan to do a review of the PTU, as does my human, so I won't say too much about it here except that it certainly gets me noticed! I had lots of peoples making those stupid cooing baby talk noises through the windows of the PTU at me as my human took me along the platform to the train. I, of course, sang to them in my loudest, strongest voice, which in turn got more of them staring at me. The human got quite embarrassed by the end, although I really don't know why.
We had to spend four hours on the train, but the human had anticipated this. She knew that if she took me out of the PTU, I would know that song practice had come to an end and I could relax until the next time I had to change trains. Now this is good human training. Why? Cuz she took me out of the PTU and kept me out. She put my walking jacket on me which is also super smart, attached a leash, then let me lounge at my leisure on her knee. Again, peoples seemed very interested in me. They said they'd never seen a ladycat on a train before, and especially not one who sat so good and quiet and who wore a smart jacket. I, of course, showed off to my adoring public, but I didn't let them touch me. I don't like it when hands come out of nowhere to try and stroke my beautiful furs. I mean, can you imagine all the cleaning you have to do to get their people stink out of a long, fluffy coat? It's disgusting!
Now I mentioned that the human was tired, but she took that to new levels on the train. Instead of paying me attention, she leaned back in her seat, fixed my lead round her upper arm so that I couldn't run off (as if I would!), then drifted off to sleep! This had me quite alarmed. It's all very well her having a surprise nap on the sofa at home, but on a train? What if we missed our stop! I knew something had to be done. Accordingly, I went into action. I stood up, stretched, climbed the human's tummy, stood on her chest and began to shout in her face and knead for all I was worth. This caused some peoples to laugh, but I wasn't paying them any attention. The human still didn't wake! I decided that it would be fun to try and get in the neck of her top. It was low already, and my kneading had made it drop a little further. Peoples are sensible in one regard. They don't like other peoples to see their poor, bald, hairless skin, so I knew that if she felt the neckline of the top move, she'd be awake in a flash. I had one and a half front paws in there when she jumped awake, pulled me out and fixed her clothing up again. Hah, victory was mine! As soon as she opened her eyes, I miaowed sweetly, gave her finger a little kissie as a reward, and went on kneading. She was cross, but ended up just laughing and giving me a cuddle. Good human!
When we arrived at the last train station, Dogman and Mark were there to meet us. Mark has a pet name for me that he uses as a joke. He calls me cooking fat, something that the human and Dogman find really funny when Mark explained that it made two kind of different words if you changed the first letters around. Mark pretends he doesn't like cats, but I know this is his way of showing that he really does like me, cuz when he says it, he usually gives me a sneaky cuddle. The human has caught him at it. Plus, he doesn't complain when I get out of the PTU in his car, nor when I sing to him. In fact, he's more sympathetic than the human! Add to this that this washis daddypeople's pretend name for one of their old pet cats that Mark loved very, very much, and I take it as a compliment. it would be bad if he really meant those other words that it makeswhen you change the letters around, but we're certain he doesn't. He just likes the play on words, and the fact that it makes peoples ask why he's calling me cooking fat. I think it's just as good as Dogman's song for me. I got to sit on
Dogman's knee on the drive home, and he and Mark practiced their miaowing for part of the
journey. They thought it was really funny that I kept miaowing back to them, but really, I was
only giving them language lessons. I was teaching them propper pronunciation, you know.
I didn't take long to settle in. I'd only been gone a few weeks, after all. Dogface was there.
I tolerated her, even when she jumped all over the human to say hello. Honestly, she has no
reservations at all, that mutt!
I slept good that night. So did the human, despite her surprise nap. The next day, she left
early in the morning. Dogman had an appointment at the eye hospital which she attended with him
in a professional capacity. Mark came and took them, but they left Dogface behind! When they came
home again, they had warm chicken with them, but they wouldn't let me have any! Shortly after
that, the human gave me a cuddle and explained that she would be leaving me for the night to go
and teach with Dogman in another far away place, and off she went. I didn't mind at all. As I've
said before, I kinda like Mark, and I know he likes me. I played the "attack the people feet
under the covers" game with him when he went to bed... All night long! If his shouting was
anything to go by, he enjoyed it a lot. I also played ping pong in the middle of the night, and
when I visited the litter tray, I came in and sang to him of my doings. Again, his talk noise,
lots of it, sounded as though he liked the fact that I kept waking him up. He was so pleased that
he was still talking about it when the human came back the next day!
She came back without Dogman. He was at his grandad's funeral, and the plan was that the human
would come home and look after Dogface and the little kittenpeoples who are Dogman's nephews, so
that the big ones could all go to the funeral. Well, the little peoples didn't turn up, and
apparently they all went with their mummypeople, so the human used the opportunity to head off
with Mark and finalise the paperwork for her new job. Yes, friends, there was more of it to be
done! They left me behind again... Starting to sense a pattern here, are you?
To take a side tangent for a moment, I heard the human mention last week how cute purr-miaows
are. To illustrate, I'll post a Youtube video, or I will when the human gets home from the work
hunt, as she's not allowed to access Youtube in work. Well, I took this comment of hers to heart,
and while she was gone on Thursday, I got to practicing. When I got hold of her on Friday, i
climbed all over her and purr-miaowed my heart out! I do like to please her from time to time,
mainly cuz i know that it often leads to tuna, but still. It got me extra cuddles, and she
started saying how much I reminded her of Mummycat, who also used to do that. She remarked on how
odd it was, cuz I've only rarely purr-miaowed for her before, but over the weekend, I was doing
it all the time. Well, if you say a thing, you gotta expect me to pick up on it!
Anyway, Saturday they all went off out again, and when the human came back, she was cold and
tired. They said they went out to look at stuff. Nothing really exciting happened that day,
except for something really, really huge! I'll leave it till the end of the post though, cuz it's
real big news, or at least, it is for us.
Yesterday, it was time to go back in the stinky PTU again to get on the train, but this time,
I'd had enough, and boy did I shout! It was so bad that the human actually thought I'd peepeed
again, but of course, I hadn't. I mean, what self-respecting ladycat would peepee in her own PTU? Last time wasn't my fault. I was calling for a mancat, and you gotta peepee more when you're like that. I couldn't help it! I was just sick of being stuffed in that thing! Even when she took me out on the train, I carried on shouting. I made her embarrassed all over again, but you know what? I didn't care! She said it was the longest few hours of her life, and she wishes I had an off button. It did get me plenty of attention though. Because of my smart jacket, one little girl even thought I might be a guide cat, cuz it was kinda like the thing Dogface used to wear when she was a guide dog, only mine was a lot nicer of course. I did settle down eventually, but I still wasn't happy, and I kept letting her know with grumbles from time to time.
We got back pretty late last night. All I wanted to do was eat, and all she wanted to do was sleep, but she had to have a shower and do some washing and make the bed and unpack her suitcase, and even make phone calls. It was Bug's step-dad's birthday yesterday, and it was the birthday of the middle humankitten that lives with Phoebe, so she called them to say hi. She also called Bug, but almost fell asleep on the phone with him. I was helping though. She can't stay awake when I cuddle her tummy, which I was doing last night.
Boy, it's good to be home again! I like travelling, but there's a lot of moving around involved in it, and it becomes a bit tiresome from time to time. The human says I tolerate it well, and so I do. I don't get worried or stressed in new places so long as the human is around, so she feels worse about leaving me behind when she goes places when compared to taking me with her. I'm happy to keep it this way. I like seeing new bits of the world.
But now, on to the big, big news. You remember I mentioned a while back that I would hopefully be having kittens? Well, the human, as you know, calls herself a breeder. However, as we've mentioned, she loves all her cats so much that we are members of the family first and foremost. As her breeding gets more serious though, she knows that other members will be added to our family. Now, she's of the opinion that all those living in a household should like each other and get along, but she also knows that when a mummycat is allowed to keep a kitten with her, they tend to be very exclusive with one another and pretty much ignore others, if they're closely bonded, that is. When you have a bonded group of two cats, it makes it easier for them to shun the rest. But of course, if she is to continue breeding, then some of our kittens will have to stay with us, right? This posed a lot of problems, as she didn't want to create little isolated groups of cats in the house, but what to do?
Well, it just so happens that both Dogman and Dogman's niece and even her mummypeople are all wanting a Persian cat. Isn't that great? Dogman has been thinking about it for some time. He loves me, but he had a real soft spot for mummycat which has never really gone away. He says he's been fighting with himself not to get one, but since I've been staying with him, he says he really misses me when I'm not around. His niece has wanted a Persian for years, as has her mummypeople who she doesn't live with any more. This is excellent news for me, and for the human. For me, cuz my kittens, well three of them at least, are guaranteed to find super duper homes and stay close enough that we can both go visit them if we like.
The human had a conversation with Dogman and the niece and explained the problems she foresaw. Both of them seemed thrilled, and she couldn't work out why until they made it clear. Many peoples believe that an animal must have a litter in order for maturation to be complete. I tend to agree in part myself, cuz I know that I'm missing out on something, something that my mummycat had, and all the others who had kittens had. On the other hand, if there aren't good homes for kittens, then it's irresponsible to bring babies into the world. Anyway, enough on that. So ideally, Dogman and the niece wanted their cats to have at least one litter of kittens before they got their ladygardenectomies. This suited the human just fine, cuz it means that she can have a kitten from one or both of the litters, and bring them into our house. As we won't be mummycat and daughters, it means that they will be treated as any other cat would. Sure we might bond, but it's unlikely to be as close as that of mummycat and daughter, so it still leaves room for the other cats in the house. So the human has agreed that, as long as they will let her have the first litter, she will give them each a kitten, and handle all the hard parts of the breeding herself like the birth, the stud, the mating. It also means that her programme progresses much more quickly. Realistically, if I have kittens this year and even one of them is a keeper, she can be on the third generation of her breeding programme within a year. This allows her to establish her lines very quickly, and to make sure that, not only does she have the best, most healthy and beautiful ladycats for breeding, but that her kittens find really good homes. As we've said before, Dogface couldn't have found a better home with Dogman, and even with me she
has to tell him off for spoiling me too much... He gives me whole tins of tuna, not just portions! I like his niece too. She talks real nice to me and she even brushed me too and gave me good chin tickles. She looks after Dogface sometimes too, and she loves her.
Wow, wasn't that a long post? I told you a lot had happened! I'm sorry that I haven't been round to visit you others. The human says she will try to do it at some point today, but she's still trying to catch up on washing and work hunting, as she did have two days off last week and there's a lot needing doing! I will help her by lying on the keyboard, headbutting her right when she's trying to concentrate, and crawling on her to force her to turn away from the computer. I will also do my impression of a cat statue in repose on top of the clean, cat-hair and wrinkle free ironing. I hope she appreciates my hard work!
Tuesday, 18 January 2011
Short and Sweet
Sorry, folks, but this is going to be a short post as the human, selfish thing that she is, says she's too busy to write for me today. Why, you might ask. Well, allow me to tell you.
It's because we're going on a journey. We're heading up to Dogman's place tomorrow evening cuz the human needs to help him out. he had some important teaching to do at his work hunt place in the evening on Thursday, but what with his grandad and all, he just hasn't had the inclination to prepare anything for the session. It's top level massage stuff which the human knows well cuz she's a physio. For her, there's no preparation needed, really, but she said she'd do it for him so that he didn't have to worry.
Grandad's funeral is on Friday, so she's going to stay up there for that. She says she won't go. She hates hates hates funerals, and would rather just remember them as they were, without having the final closure of the ceremony. So she'll travel back to Dogman's house (the teaching place is a little bit away, so she'll stay over that night, then come back to Dogman's the day after in the morning). That means she can look after Dogman's sister's humankittens when they come home from school, so that Dogman's sister can go to the funeral too. She'll also be looking after Dogface so that Dogman doesn't have to worry about her for those few days.
But there's more, cuz guess what? I'll be coming too! Oh yes I will. The human says she'd rather have me with her for the weekend so that she's not worrying in case I get sick or anything. She says if I liked the cat sitter that she uses, she'd not worry about leaving me, but when that lady comes, I hiss and spit and hide from her, so she wouldn't really be able to check me out to make sure I wasn't sick. Anyway, I like being with the human better, and I know Dogman's house now, so it won't be stressy or anything. Plus, I get to try out my new backpack carrier. It came a few days ago. The human got puppy training pads for the bottom of it cuz it's going to be a long, looooong journey. So if I do have an accident, it doesn't matter. It'll soak up real good. That's a relief for me, cuz that was mighty embarrassing last time!
But that's why she's busy tonight. us ladycats don't travel light, you know. There's litter and foods and a box and more foods and ping pong balls to be packed. There might be some room left for human stuff to go in there too, but just maybe. She's doing all that tonight, plus cleaning my boxes too (I have two in the house) so that they're all nice and fresh for when I come back. nice of her, isn't it? But it means she's running around like crazy tonight trying to get it all done, cuz we leave straight after the work hunt is over tomorrow.
Shoot me for saying it, but I'm kinda looking forward to seeing Dogface again. The house just hasn't been the same without her idiocy. The stupidity highlights my cleverness, so it did have its use. Ah well, I'll have a weekend of it. I will update you when I can.
It's because we're going on a journey. We're heading up to Dogman's place tomorrow evening cuz the human needs to help him out. he had some important teaching to do at his work hunt place in the evening on Thursday, but what with his grandad and all, he just hasn't had the inclination to prepare anything for the session. It's top level massage stuff which the human knows well cuz she's a physio. For her, there's no preparation needed, really, but she said she'd do it for him so that he didn't have to worry.
Grandad's funeral is on Friday, so she's going to stay up there for that. She says she won't go. She hates hates hates funerals, and would rather just remember them as they were, without having the final closure of the ceremony. So she'll travel back to Dogman's house (the teaching place is a little bit away, so she'll stay over that night, then come back to Dogman's the day after in the morning). That means she can look after Dogman's sister's humankittens when they come home from school, so that Dogman's sister can go to the funeral too. She'll also be looking after Dogface so that Dogman doesn't have to worry about her for those few days.
But there's more, cuz guess what? I'll be coming too! Oh yes I will. The human says she'd rather have me with her for the weekend so that she's not worrying in case I get sick or anything. She says if I liked the cat sitter that she uses, she'd not worry about leaving me, but when that lady comes, I hiss and spit and hide from her, so she wouldn't really be able to check me out to make sure I wasn't sick. Anyway, I like being with the human better, and I know Dogman's house now, so it won't be stressy or anything. Plus, I get to try out my new backpack carrier. It came a few days ago. The human got puppy training pads for the bottom of it cuz it's going to be a long, looooong journey. So if I do have an accident, it doesn't matter. It'll soak up real good. That's a relief for me, cuz that was mighty embarrassing last time!
But that's why she's busy tonight. us ladycats don't travel light, you know. There's litter and foods and a box and more foods and ping pong balls to be packed. There might be some room left for human stuff to go in there too, but just maybe. She's doing all that tonight, plus cleaning my boxes too (I have two in the house) so that they're all nice and fresh for when I come back. nice of her, isn't it? But it means she's running around like crazy tonight trying to get it all done, cuz we leave straight after the work hunt is over tomorrow.
Shoot me for saying it, but I'm kinda looking forward to seeing Dogface again. The house just hasn't been the same without her idiocy. The stupidity highlights my cleverness, so it did have its use. Ah well, I'll have a weekend of it. I will update you when I can.
Saturday, 1 January 2011
Happy New Year!
I really do wish you all a happy new year, and I hope that it brings you nothing but happiness, sun puddles, stinky goodness, cuddling on demand and all the ping pong balls your heart could desire! My human made a good start on my new year. She came home as she should have done on Thursday. She was very tired when she got here, but then I guess I'd be tired too if I'd been swallowed by a bird, digested for an hour, flown across a lot of wet stuff very high in the air, then regurgitated on the other side, stuffed on a train then on a bus, then finally dumped at home. That's quite a lot for one poor human to go through! She managed though.
When she got here, I pretended like I hadn't missed her at all, even though I had. Dogman was here, you see, and I couldn't have him thinking that I'd gone soft and that I actually could be swayed by emotion. Once the peoples learn that, they have you over a barrel, so I'm always careful to keep 'em guessing. I ignored her until she came to cuddle me on my special chair that I've claimed as my own. It's right near the warm heater, and Dogman doesn't even dare sit on it any more. When she came, I purred for her, but didn't do much else. I was planning to hold out until Dogman disappeared so as I could show my human how I really felt, but after five minutes, I could stand it no longer. I don't think the human could either. I jumped down off my chair and walked casually towards my room, you know, the one I told you about which is just mine? I kept looking back at the human, asking her to follow me with my eyes. I'd been able to train Dogman to do this over the last week. Even though his eyes are broke, they're not as broke as the human's, so he can see what I'm up to. When the human didn't come, I remembered, and started to talk to her instead. She's a good human. She came when I did that. I kept stopping often to let her get nice and close before I took a few more steps and called to her again. I took her right into my room like this, and behind the door where Dogman couldn't see. then I waited till she sat on the floor. When she did this, I walked all over the room, calling to her now and again so that she could hear where I was and how big the room was. I showed her where my foods were, where my water was and where the box was. Then I came back and made a huge fuss of her for being such a good human and doing what I told her. I might have gotten a little carried away with the head rubbing so that I actually lost my balance and fell over on my back, but I'm not saying nothing.
A very, very long time later, I let her leave the room, but once my big fuss was done, I came and sat with her on the sofa. I climbed up on her chest for a propper cuddle. It's good up there, cuz it means she has to put her arms up to hold me and I can snuggle right down and feel real, real cosy.
After a while, she went back to the suitcase, and I got a bit worried. Was she going away again so soon? She'd only just come back! I watched her anxiously for a while, but all she did was pull a funny looking small soft thing from the case. She pulled it from its packaging, then opened a small tub. Well, that got my attention right away! The smell of potent new catnip was unmistakable. She put the catnip into the soft thing, and when I looked again, I could see it was a little chicken! I was so excited that I started to play with it even before she'd finished filling it. She made me wait cuz I was scratching her hands in my excitement. I was kinda sorry about that, cuz it was nice of her to bring me a toy back, but I was just too excited to wait! When she finally let me have it, I killed that chicken good! She made Dogman take pictures and videos. We'll get the videos up as soon as we can, and whenever we have them, we'll get someone else to post the pictures. Keep checking back! There's even a photo of me standing over it and holding it down after I'd killed it. You will be able to see what a brave ladycat I was to do that! That chicken is fierce, you know, but I showed it who was boss.
The human and Dogman went to Dogman's brother's house for dinner the same day she came back. I was a bit put out. How dare she leave me alone so soon! Yesterday night they went out too. They said it was new year and that they were going to Dogman's mummypeople's house. I asked them to take Dogface with them to get her out of my fur, but they wouldn't listen, so I had to put up with her hogging the TV. She lies right in front of it! That means I can't get close enough to bat the screen, so it annoys me.
This morning though, tragedy struck. Dogface got a poopy bum again, real, real bad. But that's not the tragedy. Well, it is for the human, but there's worse to come from me! As soon as Dogface went and showed the human her runny bum in the garden, the human came in, and friends, she stole my chicken and put it in her pocket! What's more, when I climbed up on her to retrieve it, she not only prevented me from getting it, but put me in my room and closed the door! her reasoning is this: Dogface had stolen my chicken a few times, so it had been in her mouth. If this is a recurrance of the bug, I can't be allowed to chew on the same chicken Dogface has slobbered all over. She says I can have it back, but not before she's dipped it in something called coloidal silver. It's stuff that's sposed to kill all bacteria. But friends, she's locked me up! She says that Dogface has never been in my room thanks to the baby gate, and, of course, my ferocious defending of my territory. So if she has the bug, the only place that's guaranteed to be free of it is in my room. There I must stay, but I tell you something, I'm not happy about it! It might be much bigger than a PTU, but a prison is a prison, no matter which way you dress it up. Sure, I have a comfy massage table to lie on, and carpets so soft that your paws sink right into them until you can hardly see your claws, and she did give me almost a half a tin of tuna with the reasoning that I'd eat my fill and then sleep most of the day and be less distressed, but it's just not the same. I need to leave my mark on this place, and on stupid Dogface, before I leave tomorrow.
And that's another thing. Tomorrow. I have a three and a half hour stint in the horrible PTU in the horrible car tomorrow to get back home. The thought of it fills me with dread. I don't like being stuck in them for that long, specially not when I need to go to the toilet like I did last time. It's frankly less than comfortable! But endure it I must, apparently. I'm gonna make them pay for it. I'm gonna sing all the way!
Thanks so much to everyone who came to visit me on my 100th post. It was lovely to see you all! I'm also really flattered that three of you wanted to do a gift exchange with me! If there had been lots, my human was going to pick one at random, but as there's so few, we might just exchange with you all! One thing though. Admiral, I'm sorry to have to do this, but my human's being a dreadful bore. She knows you're sick at the moment, and is terrified of introducing another bug to our household. She knows your people wouldn't send anything intentionally, but she's so scared of me getting sick again that she asks if we could wait a while before exchanging gifts with you. I tried to tell her that you'd ensure mr bug didn't smuggle aboard, but she's a worry wart as you know. Do you mind terribly? To Amy and the Random Felines, thanks so much for agreeing to exchange with me! Is there anything in particular you like when it comes to toys? My human was hoping to get to the toy pet shop while she was staying with Dogman, but she hasn't managed to yet, so she will probly end up ordering everything off the internet instead. This means it might take her a week or two before she can send. Is this all right? could you drop us an email with your postal addresses and how many cats you share your house with? thank you so much! The human says you can write to the address in her profile, but she doesn't want to put it here to make it easy for spammers. If you have any trouble, just let us know.
We also hit our 1000th visitor over the new year too! So not only have we had 100 posts, but we've had ten times as many visitors! I'm so shocked that so many peoples and cats read what I have to say! Oh, everything's so exciting today! Sept the fact that I'm stuck in my prison. Does anyone have any escape plans which have a guaranteed success? My human has only came in to cuddle me three times in the last hour. it's not enough! I'm dying of loneliness here! my tuna is all done too, and I'm dying of starvation! It's just too much to bear! Heeeeeeelp!
When she got here, I pretended like I hadn't missed her at all, even though I had. Dogman was here, you see, and I couldn't have him thinking that I'd gone soft and that I actually could be swayed by emotion. Once the peoples learn that, they have you over a barrel, so I'm always careful to keep 'em guessing. I ignored her until she came to cuddle me on my special chair that I've claimed as my own. It's right near the warm heater, and Dogman doesn't even dare sit on it any more. When she came, I purred for her, but didn't do much else. I was planning to hold out until Dogman disappeared so as I could show my human how I really felt, but after five minutes, I could stand it no longer. I don't think the human could either. I jumped down off my chair and walked casually towards my room, you know, the one I told you about which is just mine? I kept looking back at the human, asking her to follow me with my eyes. I'd been able to train Dogman to do this over the last week. Even though his eyes are broke, they're not as broke as the human's, so he can see what I'm up to. When the human didn't come, I remembered, and started to talk to her instead. She's a good human. She came when I did that. I kept stopping often to let her get nice and close before I took a few more steps and called to her again. I took her right into my room like this, and behind the door where Dogman couldn't see. then I waited till she sat on the floor. When she did this, I walked all over the room, calling to her now and again so that she could hear where I was and how big the room was. I showed her where my foods were, where my water was and where the box was. Then I came back and made a huge fuss of her for being such a good human and doing what I told her. I might have gotten a little carried away with the head rubbing so that I actually lost my balance and fell over on my back, but I'm not saying nothing.
A very, very long time later, I let her leave the room, but once my big fuss was done, I came and sat with her on the sofa. I climbed up on her chest for a propper cuddle. It's good up there, cuz it means she has to put her arms up to hold me and I can snuggle right down and feel real, real cosy.
After a while, she went back to the suitcase, and I got a bit worried. Was she going away again so soon? She'd only just come back! I watched her anxiously for a while, but all she did was pull a funny looking small soft thing from the case. She pulled it from its packaging, then opened a small tub. Well, that got my attention right away! The smell of potent new catnip was unmistakable. She put the catnip into the soft thing, and when I looked again, I could see it was a little chicken! I was so excited that I started to play with it even before she'd finished filling it. She made me wait cuz I was scratching her hands in my excitement. I was kinda sorry about that, cuz it was nice of her to bring me a toy back, but I was just too excited to wait! When she finally let me have it, I killed that chicken good! She made Dogman take pictures and videos. We'll get the videos up as soon as we can, and whenever we have them, we'll get someone else to post the pictures. Keep checking back! There's even a photo of me standing over it and holding it down after I'd killed it. You will be able to see what a brave ladycat I was to do that! That chicken is fierce, you know, but I showed it who was boss.
The human and Dogman went to Dogman's brother's house for dinner the same day she came back. I was a bit put out. How dare she leave me alone so soon! Yesterday night they went out too. They said it was new year and that they were going to Dogman's mummypeople's house. I asked them to take Dogface with them to get her out of my fur, but they wouldn't listen, so I had to put up with her hogging the TV. She lies right in front of it! That means I can't get close enough to bat the screen, so it annoys me.
This morning though, tragedy struck. Dogface got a poopy bum again, real, real bad. But that's not the tragedy. Well, it is for the human, but there's worse to come from me! As soon as Dogface went and showed the human her runny bum in the garden, the human came in, and friends, she stole my chicken and put it in her pocket! What's more, when I climbed up on her to retrieve it, she not only prevented me from getting it, but put me in my room and closed the door! her reasoning is this: Dogface had stolen my chicken a few times, so it had been in her mouth. If this is a recurrance of the bug, I can't be allowed to chew on the same chicken Dogface has slobbered all over. She says I can have it back, but not before she's dipped it in something called coloidal silver. It's stuff that's sposed to kill all bacteria. But friends, she's locked me up! She says that Dogface has never been in my room thanks to the baby gate, and, of course, my ferocious defending of my territory. So if she has the bug, the only place that's guaranteed to be free of it is in my room. There I must stay, but I tell you something, I'm not happy about it! It might be much bigger than a PTU, but a prison is a prison, no matter which way you dress it up. Sure, I have a comfy massage table to lie on, and carpets so soft that your paws sink right into them until you can hardly see your claws, and she did give me almost a half a tin of tuna with the reasoning that I'd eat my fill and then sleep most of the day and be less distressed, but it's just not the same. I need to leave my mark on this place, and on stupid Dogface, before I leave tomorrow.
And that's another thing. Tomorrow. I have a three and a half hour stint in the horrible PTU in the horrible car tomorrow to get back home. The thought of it fills me with dread. I don't like being stuck in them for that long, specially not when I need to go to the toilet like I did last time. It's frankly less than comfortable! But endure it I must, apparently. I'm gonna make them pay for it. I'm gonna sing all the way!
Thanks so much to everyone who came to visit me on my 100th post. It was lovely to see you all! I'm also really flattered that three of you wanted to do a gift exchange with me! If there had been lots, my human was going to pick one at random, but as there's so few, we might just exchange with you all! One thing though. Admiral, I'm sorry to have to do this, but my human's being a dreadful bore. She knows you're sick at the moment, and is terrified of introducing another bug to our household. She knows your people wouldn't send anything intentionally, but she's so scared of me getting sick again that she asks if we could wait a while before exchanging gifts with you. I tried to tell her that you'd ensure mr bug didn't smuggle aboard, but she's a worry wart as you know. Do you mind terribly? To Amy and the Random Felines, thanks so much for agreeing to exchange with me! Is there anything in particular you like when it comes to toys? My human was hoping to get to the toy pet shop while she was staying with Dogman, but she hasn't managed to yet, so she will probly end up ordering everything off the internet instead. This means it might take her a week or two before she can send. Is this all right? could you drop us an email with your postal addresses and how many cats you share your house with? thank you so much! The human says you can write to the address in her profile, but she doesn't want to put it here to make it easy for spammers. If you have any trouble, just let us know.
We also hit our 1000th visitor over the new year too! So not only have we had 100 posts, but we've had ten times as many visitors! I'm so shocked that so many peoples and cats read what I have to say! Oh, everything's so exciting today! Sept the fact that I'm stuck in my prison. Does anyone have any escape plans which have a guaranteed success? My human has only came in to cuddle me three times in the last hour. it's not enough! I'm dying of loneliness here! my tuna is all done too, and I'm dying of starvation! It's just too much to bear! Heeeeeeelp!
Monday, 13 December 2010
Human Merrits?
Friends, I don't mean to startle you, and what I am about to say may at first seme ludicrous, misled, even a little insane, but I have discovered today that the human species have merrits. More than that, they have initiative. I didn't want to say that right off, cuz I feared some of you would be so shocked you'd drop where you stood. Better to ease into it slowly. They do though, or at least, mine does... Or should i say did. Why, I hear you ask? Cuz she sprung me from prison, that's why. And she says she didn't even need a rope concealed in a pie to do it! I don't know what ropes or pies have to do with anything, but humans are weird. I accept this.
As you know, I had a sick tummy again last Friday which meant I had to go to the vet peoples. What you don't know is that this was code for I have to go to prison. I really hate the vet prison. A PTU is bad enough, but at least you know you can get out of that in a short while, and at least you're in it alone. At the vets, the PTU doesn't move and is bigger and called a cage, but there are just so many other cats and nasty smells and the litter in my box is different and it isn't even my box and, well, the list goes on. As if that's not bad enough, peoples will periodically come, take you out of the PTU that isn't a PTU, then poke and prod at you until you're blue in the face with swearing at them. not that I'd swear, of course. It's not my fault they interpretted my gentle "get off, you fat, blithering idiot" as swearing. If they can't speak felinese, it's not my fault, is it? They should have studied languages harder at school. My human speaks it, so there's no excuse.
The vet peoples always insist on thieving too. This time they stole my bloods a few times, and they started poo pinching too. I held out for as long as I could, friends, but when you're there for days, when you gotta go, you just gotta go. The idea of them stealing that disgusts me so much that I try and hold back where I can, so I only went once since Friday, and that was hard, I tell you, as I've been eating like a horse and there just isn't room for any more in there!
I heard my human talking to the vet peoples a few times on the phone, but finally, today, she got the message; I want to go home. I know she'd been trying to bust me out of there for ages, cuz I could hear the vet peoples saying I wasn't ready, but today they said they wanted to keep me in just for another poo sample. The uman said she wasn't happy with that, and would happily collect a sample at home so that I could get out of there. I don't know what else she said, but my heart leapt, then dropped as they hung up the phone and didn't come get me straight away. I was so, so disappointed.
Here's where the strange part comes in though. After a while, they did come and get me for no discernable reason. They put me in the PTU and brought me to a little room where the human was waiting. I don't know how she did it, but she did. Perhaps they're just so afraid of her that they daren't refuse to hand me over when she's there in person, or perhaps it had to do with the fact that the human had a prearranged pick up time. I'm with the former.
Now, sit down, friends, cuz there's another shock in store. When I saw the human, I went crazy. I mashed my face on the front of the PTU, I called to her. In fact, I was so vigorous that she was worried I was going to hurt myself. This is all part of the conditioning though. I had to reward her for good behaviour in busting me out so that, next time, she'll remember the good things she got and will come bust me out again. So I put up bravely with all the rubbing and the chin tickling and the scratching and I may even have purred for her and I may even have really smushed her hand with my face, but if I did, it's all part of the conditioning. Oh it's a hard life being a trainer.
None of the results have come back from my stolen bloods, and the human is going to steal some of my poo whether I like it or not, so we'll have to keep you informed once we know more. We would, though, like to extend heart felt thanks to everyone that came to wish me well while I was in prison. It means a lot to know that there are so many out there purring for you every day. We're so sorry to Amy and her House of Cats that we didn't do a propper post to say thank you for featuring us in Friends on Friday. Amy, we both really appreciate it!
To make sure the human is put back in her place, I bit her when I got home. I rolled on my back, pretended to show her my yummy tummy, then grabbed her with all four feet and bit. I had to do it before she got to thinking that all that purring and smushing was to be the norm. Carrot and stick, trainer friends, carrot and stick. I'm lying on the self heating heating pad which is her lap right now. Kind of her to make it available for me. Not so kind that there's no food down. She says that I'm having nothing but stinky goodness for the next few days. That means though that it can't be down all the time, cuz it goes bad quick. It's to give my tummy a rest and let it recover from all the bad stuff it's been doing. Well, ya don't hear me complainin', do ya!
As you know, I had a sick tummy again last Friday which meant I had to go to the vet peoples. What you don't know is that this was code for I have to go to prison. I really hate the vet prison. A PTU is bad enough, but at least you know you can get out of that in a short while, and at least you're in it alone. At the vets, the PTU doesn't move and is bigger and called a cage, but there are just so many other cats and nasty smells and the litter in my box is different and it isn't even my box and, well, the list goes on. As if that's not bad enough, peoples will periodically come, take you out of the PTU that isn't a PTU, then poke and prod at you until you're blue in the face with swearing at them. not that I'd swear, of course. It's not my fault they interpretted my gentle "get off, you fat, blithering idiot" as swearing. If they can't speak felinese, it's not my fault, is it? They should have studied languages harder at school. My human speaks it, so there's no excuse.
The vet peoples always insist on thieving too. This time they stole my bloods a few times, and they started poo pinching too. I held out for as long as I could, friends, but when you're there for days, when you gotta go, you just gotta go. The idea of them stealing that disgusts me so much that I try and hold back where I can, so I only went once since Friday, and that was hard, I tell you, as I've been eating like a horse and there just isn't room for any more in there!
I heard my human talking to the vet peoples a few times on the phone, but finally, today, she got the message; I want to go home. I know she'd been trying to bust me out of there for ages, cuz I could hear the vet peoples saying I wasn't ready, but today they said they wanted to keep me in just for another poo sample. The uman said she wasn't happy with that, and would happily collect a sample at home so that I could get out of there. I don't know what else she said, but my heart leapt, then dropped as they hung up the phone and didn't come get me straight away. I was so, so disappointed.
Here's where the strange part comes in though. After a while, they did come and get me for no discernable reason. They put me in the PTU and brought me to a little room where the human was waiting. I don't know how she did it, but she did. Perhaps they're just so afraid of her that they daren't refuse to hand me over when she's there in person, or perhaps it had to do with the fact that the human had a prearranged pick up time. I'm with the former.
Now, sit down, friends, cuz there's another shock in store. When I saw the human, I went crazy. I mashed my face on the front of the PTU, I called to her. In fact, I was so vigorous that she was worried I was going to hurt myself. This is all part of the conditioning though. I had to reward her for good behaviour in busting me out so that, next time, she'll remember the good things she got and will come bust me out again. So I put up bravely with all the rubbing and the chin tickling and the scratching and I may even have purred for her and I may even have really smushed her hand with my face, but if I did, it's all part of the conditioning. Oh it's a hard life being a trainer.
None of the results have come back from my stolen bloods, and the human is going to steal some of my poo whether I like it or not, so we'll have to keep you informed once we know more. We would, though, like to extend heart felt thanks to everyone that came to wish me well while I was in prison. It means a lot to know that there are so many out there purring for you every day. We're so sorry to Amy and her House of Cats that we didn't do a propper post to say thank you for featuring us in Friends on Friday. Amy, we both really appreciate it!
To make sure the human is put back in her place, I bit her when I got home. I rolled on my back, pretended to show her my yummy tummy, then grabbed her with all four feet and bit. I had to do it before she got to thinking that all that purring and smushing was to be the norm. Carrot and stick, trainer friends, carrot and stick. I'm lying on the self heating heating pad which is her lap right now. Kind of her to make it available for me. Not so kind that there's no food down. She says that I'm having nothing but stinky goodness for the next few days. That means though that it can't be down all the time, cuz it goes bad quick. It's to give my tummy a rest and let it recover from all the bad stuff it's been doing. Well, ya don't hear me complainin', do ya!
Tuesday, 5 October 2010
Tortureshell Tuesday: Bath-time Romp
Yep, it's that time again, and hasn't it come around fast! I've been working my hardest to do something stupendously bad for Tortureshell, but I'll let you be the judge of whether I succeeded or not. By the way, huge points to Sweet Praline. She's the only one brave enough to actively involve herself in this most splendid of events!
I told you yesterday that the human gave me a bath on Sunday. She has to do this twice a week for the next little while because I was more naughty and kept scratching my collar. The next time I do this, remind me about horrible, stinky shampoo, will you? Maybe then I'll remember that it's really not worth the trouble it gets me into. Even I have limits of naughtiness!
But look, I'm getting side-tracked again. The human has a special carrier (PTU) that she keeps for bathing. She says it's because it's old, so it doesn't matter if it gets caked in stinky shampoo. She can't use it to carry me in because the door comes off if I jump hard on the bottom, and she doesn't agree with just throwing things away if they can be useful for something else, so it stays in the bathroom.
Into the bath I went, complaining bitterly. What had I done to deserve this treatment! I'd been nothing but a good nurse, and here she was getting me all wet for no reason other than to put stinky horrible on me! Life isn't fair sometimes, and boy did I tell her.
Once she'd covered me in the horrible stuff, she bundled, yes bundled! me into this PTU. I didn't want to go. I braced my front paws with claws out against the plastic, but she just pushed harder. I went star-shaped, but she folded my legs in and shoved me in face first. I stuck my bum out the door but she gave it a pat and it brought back all the memories of those mancats trying to do the unladylike things with me. Quick as a flash, I whipped my tail away from her, and in that instant, the heartless jailor slammed the door and turned the catches.
Well, I was furious! I was so mad I was even jumping up and down inside that PTU, but it was on the floor, so it couldn't bend at the bottom and release me from stinky, wet, PTU hell! She put a towel over me the same as before to keep the heat in, and then she left me alone. She shouldn't have done that, friends, because here's where I went into action.
I have strong front paws. It comes from all the kneading I've had to do on the human to make her feel better over the last few days. I didn't know I needed this extra strength, but boy was I glad I had it. Slowly, quietly so that the jailor wouldn't hear me, I reached out and grabbed the bars of the door. I pulled, but nothing happened. I shook, but they stayed solid. Getting desperate now (I wanted rid of the stinky, and there was no food in there with me!) I lowered my shoulder, dropped my head, backed up, then charged. And you know what? It worked! I was free! And what's more, I had a whole bathroom to play with.
Now I know I'm supposed to keep the shampoo on me for ten minutes to let it do whatever it's supposed to do, but there were a lot of surfaces in that room which were free of it, and in my opinion, I had an awful lot too much on my fur. I started rubbing. I rubbed my whole body. I even climbed so that I could cover all available areas in the stinky yuck. When the jailor came back, I was in the middle of having a great wrestling match with that pesky towel that had covered me. It was still warm and I was a bit cold, so although I was fighting with it, I was all wrapped inside it too. This one was the best. It took off the mostest shampoo.
For some reason, the human wasn't pleased. "Another towel wash, then," she groaned as she pulled me from the tangle I'd made, then dumped me right back in the tub! I complained, but it was more of a token gesture this time. I knew she was going to get rid of the stink, so what was the point in fighting it when it was what I wanted?
Human picture: On hearing an almighty rumpus coming from the bathroom, I scooted back in there really quick thinking she might have managed to overturn the carrier. Picture the scene. A hot, steamy bathroom, the stink of shampoo thick in the air, the gentle drip, drip, drip of bubbles cascading off the sides of the tub, the toilet, sink, litter tray, walls, the soothing splish-splosh of the veritable lake of suds on the floor as Tia's small paws hit it as she scampered from one place to the next. And the towel? It doesn't even bear mentioning. It was a sodden, soapy mess, complete with fur-puddle in the middle of it. Oh, she had fun all right.
The human says I succeeded in torturing her. It took her quite a time to get all of the shampoo off the bathroom. Hah. Maybe she'll think twice about putting me in the bath next time!
Now, it's over to you. Whether you're a naughty tortie or not, torture those peoples!
I told you yesterday that the human gave me a bath on Sunday. She has to do this twice a week for the next little while because I was more naughty and kept scratching my collar. The next time I do this, remind me about horrible, stinky shampoo, will you? Maybe then I'll remember that it's really not worth the trouble it gets me into. Even I have limits of naughtiness!
But look, I'm getting side-tracked again. The human has a special carrier (PTU) that she keeps for bathing. She says it's because it's old, so it doesn't matter if it gets caked in stinky shampoo. She can't use it to carry me in because the door comes off if I jump hard on the bottom, and she doesn't agree with just throwing things away if they can be useful for something else, so it stays in the bathroom.
Into the bath I went, complaining bitterly. What had I done to deserve this treatment! I'd been nothing but a good nurse, and here she was getting me all wet for no reason other than to put stinky horrible on me! Life isn't fair sometimes, and boy did I tell her.
Once she'd covered me in the horrible stuff, she bundled, yes bundled! me into this PTU. I didn't want to go. I braced my front paws with claws out against the plastic, but she just pushed harder. I went star-shaped, but she folded my legs in and shoved me in face first. I stuck my bum out the door but she gave it a pat and it brought back all the memories of those mancats trying to do the unladylike things with me. Quick as a flash, I whipped my tail away from her, and in that instant, the heartless jailor slammed the door and turned the catches.
Well, I was furious! I was so mad I was even jumping up and down inside that PTU, but it was on the floor, so it couldn't bend at the bottom and release me from stinky, wet, PTU hell! She put a towel over me the same as before to keep the heat in, and then she left me alone. She shouldn't have done that, friends, because here's where I went into action.
I have strong front paws. It comes from all the kneading I've had to do on the human to make her feel better over the last few days. I didn't know I needed this extra strength, but boy was I glad I had it. Slowly, quietly so that the jailor wouldn't hear me, I reached out and grabbed the bars of the door. I pulled, but nothing happened. I shook, but they stayed solid. Getting desperate now (I wanted rid of the stinky, and there was no food in there with me!) I lowered my shoulder, dropped my head, backed up, then charged. And you know what? It worked! I was free! And what's more, I had a whole bathroom to play with.
Now I know I'm supposed to keep the shampoo on me for ten minutes to let it do whatever it's supposed to do, but there were a lot of surfaces in that room which were free of it, and in my opinion, I had an awful lot too much on my fur. I started rubbing. I rubbed my whole body. I even climbed so that I could cover all available areas in the stinky yuck. When the jailor came back, I was in the middle of having a great wrestling match with that pesky towel that had covered me. It was still warm and I was a bit cold, so although I was fighting with it, I was all wrapped inside it too. This one was the best. It took off the mostest shampoo.
For some reason, the human wasn't pleased. "Another towel wash, then," she groaned as she pulled me from the tangle I'd made, then dumped me right back in the tub! I complained, but it was more of a token gesture this time. I knew she was going to get rid of the stink, so what was the point in fighting it when it was what I wanted?
Human picture: On hearing an almighty rumpus coming from the bathroom, I scooted back in there really quick thinking she might have managed to overturn the carrier. Picture the scene. A hot, steamy bathroom, the stink of shampoo thick in the air, the gentle drip, drip, drip of bubbles cascading off the sides of the tub, the toilet, sink, litter tray, walls, the soothing splish-splosh of the veritable lake of suds on the floor as Tia's small paws hit it as she scampered from one place to the next. And the towel? It doesn't even bear mentioning. It was a sodden, soapy mess, complete with fur-puddle in the middle of it. Oh, she had fun all right.
The human says I succeeded in torturing her. It took her quite a time to get all of the shampoo off the bathroom. Hah. Maybe she'll think twice about putting me in the bath next time!
Now, it's over to you. Whether you're a naughty tortie or not, torture those peoples!
Friday, 1 October 2010
Farewell, Mummycat
The day has finally arrived. It's Mummycat's last day in the house. i'm not going to write much today, as I'm sad and the human has very runny eyes which she says makes it hard to type. I don't know how runny eyes mean your hands don't work, but I do know that peoples are strange things, so I take her at her word.
The human spoke to the people that we used to live with today on the phone, and it's all been arranged. Tomorrow Mummycat will go in a horrible new PTU (this is a Prisoner Transport Unit and is apparently the propper cat name for the silly peoples carriers that they put us in). This one is closed and doesn't have the wire on the doors. The human is hoping it will make Mummycat feel more secure when she has to go on the train because there's not as much visibility and she can hide better. Last time, Mummycat was so upset by the journey and the new place that she wouldn't eat, but she's hoping it will be different this time.
The human has spent a lot of time with her this evening. She says she's saying goodbye, but I'm starting to wonder if Mummycat is making her sick. Last time she came out of there, her eyes were running so bad that her whole face was wet, and she couldn't even breathe propperly. It was all short and uneven and when she spoke, it sounded like she had a cold. I haven't shouted at her for going either like I usually do. She thinks I know something's happening, and she knows Mummycat does, as she's been extra cuddly. I think that's a stupid thing to think. I don't think something's happening. I know it.I am hoping that Whicky puts the picture of Mummycat up that we sent him so that you can all see the reason for my beauty. She is a yummy mummy, and, in spite of me needing to be a worldly wise, growed up cat out from under her paw, I really am going to miss her a lot. She is my mummy, after all.
Human: Pardon for the sad tone of the blog tonight, but I just don't have the heart to be cheerful. Cindy is one of those very few cats who is able, in some inexplicable way, to touch the heart more than the average one. Perhaps it is because I've seen her go from a cat who always hides in a litter tray to one who, with a bit of coaxing, will come for a cuddle. When she cuddles, she gives her whole self to it and turns into a big floppy, soppy puddle of mush. I am going to miss her more than I can say. I'm so, so angry at breeders right now. How dare they keep cats in cattery conditions all of their lives. They have denied both of us the chance at a long, happy relationship because this little person never was given the chance as a youngster to snuggle and cuddle with humans outside of a cattery. She's destined to live out the rest of her life in those kinds of environments all because someone put money above the happiness of a cat. I hope those people don't sleep easy in their beds tonight. I hope they realise what they've done. The worst part is that I know they won't. They'll carry on churning out kittens and making cats like Cindy miserable and sad when they're offered the chance of a good, fulfilling life that every cat should have, and all because it brings in a bit of extra cash. Is anything worth that price?
Now before I really start ranting, I'm going to end the post. I have a cat to cuddle and a heart to mend. I'm sure tia will help with that. Cindy, extra cuddly, smooshy Cindy who's giving me headbutts where she never did before and purring fit to burst as soon as I go into the room, deserves all the snuggling I can get in tonight before she goes back to the life she certainly doesn't deserve. I'm only sorry that there couldn't be another way out. Unethical, money-driven breeders, I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!
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