Apache, Revealed!

Ok peoples, apparently (aren't I clever for using big words like
that?) it's my turn to write acuz I'm the new one here and mummycat
says that I gotta write to tell you all who I am. But you already know
who I am acuz you saw me when I was a eeny weeny babycat, didn't you!
Anyway, my name's Apache. I know you know it already, but mummycat
says I gotta tell you my name else you'll not know who I am, and I do
what mummycat tells me to, well, I do when she's watchin' acuz if I
don't, she'll smack me for being a bad babycat.

I'll be 6 months old in 6 days, and that's big! I think I get to be a
girlcat when I'm 6 months old, right? When all my brothers and sisters
had chosen their new slaves to live with, the human told me I'd have
to choose too, but I'd already done it. The human is my person. I love
her and love her and love her some more. I give her lotsa kissies even
when she insults me by telling peoples I lick her like a dog. I
snuggle into her neck, I get in bed with her. I purpurpur so loudly
that my whole body shakes and then I gotta let my mouth fall open for
extra resinan thingy, sound, and the human loves it! I will choose her
lap over anybody else's acuz she's the nicest. I talk to her all the
time. I climb on her all the time. I even stop doing things when she
tells me to! So when the others went, I stayed here.

I was sad to see my stinky brothers and sisters go, but I just gotted
more attention when they left. Gabby is my bestest friend in the whole
wide universe! We get up to lotsa trouble, um, I mean good girl games,
together, and we play THoE all the time. We enjoy it more when we can
run over the top of the human and Dogman, but they don't like that so
much.

I like climbing up the human's leg too, but she always calls me "Ow
Apache!" and "get off you hooligan!" when I do that. I tried to climb
up the tea towel hanging from the cupboard door today to get to the
yummy foods that my human was making for us. She was feeding my
favourite. We all eat raw foods now, and we were getting vennison this
morning. Yum yum! It's my favrit one! I yelled and yelled and yelled
at her, but she just told me I'd have to wait! So I tried to climb up
to the worktop to get at the foods, but my favrit human just dumped me
back on the floor! She's so horrible! I barged grannycat and Gabby and
mummycat outta the way though to be first to eat, and I wouldn't let
them have a bit of the beef jerky either that the human gives us to
clean our toothies. i eated everyone's bit!

Grannycat likes me. Everybody says this is really unusual as grannycat
doesn't like anybody and won't share a lap or the human with anybody,
ever! But grannycat cuddles on the human and I get to cuddle too, and
I even lied on top of her the other day. And mummycat told me to look
out acuz I'd get the smackypaw of doom, but grannycat didn't do
anything! I like my grannycat. She's all warm and cuddly and soft and
she washes my head and she loves me lots.

And that's all I can think of for now, but I'll be back to write more
soon I think!

Lotsa love

Apache

We're Baaaaack!

Hi friends!

We all would like to start the post by saying sorry that we've not
been around in ages. As you probably know, the human was experiencing
blog problems for ages. For some reason, Blogger wasn't even letting
her post by email, but she's got that worked out now, so hopefully
this post will go up! Then, after Christmas, we had some, well, let's
call it stuff, going on, and she lost her mojo a little bit. Hopefully
though, we're now back! We've missed you all loads and loads!

We know you'd probly like to hear what's been happening to us over the
last while, but we're gonna put that on hold till another day. Why?
Cuz we've got something much, much more exciting to miaow you all
about! Our Secret Paws package!

Sadly, it didn't arrive in time for Christmouse, but we know we're
good girls, so we just know'd that Santa Paws wouldn't forget us. So
we waited and waited and waited, and eventually, one of the silly
peoples that lives beside the human came to her door and said that she
had a package for her that the man in the shorts had left ages ago but
that she'd forgotted about! And it was our Secret Paws package!

Sadly, we don't know who it's from as the human's eyes don't work well
enough to read the letter in the bag, but we got a photo too! Again,
sadly, the package had been badly handled, so it came to us with a
couple of holes in. We don't know if we got everything that our lovely
Secret Paws put in there for us, so if we don't mention something in
the post, that's why, but we got enough that we're super, super happy!
There was loads of stuff in there!

First of all, the human gived us some little balls and mousies, and we
went mad for them! Gabby chased everything, Tia chased all the balls,
and we had a great time! But then, the best thing ever came outta the
box. Not 1, but 2 Pawbreakers! Friends, our human says we all went a
little loopyloo when they came out. We were running so hard that we
were even hitting the walls! The human says she still hasn't been able
to find one of the Pawbreakers, cuz we whapped it so hard that it
hadda go hide somewhere! We're not telling where!

But friends, it gets even better than that! Next out was something
that was real, real, real, real whiffy! The human couldn't even get it
all the way outta its bag before Millie was diving on her and trying
to wrassle it outta her hands. Friends, it was a super huge mousie,
just stuffed brimful of the whiffiest catnip ever in the whole wide
world! And it has a super long tail! Our human teased us. She held
onto the tail and maked the mousie twitch around all over the floor.
And Millie loved it! She dived on it and bunnykicked it and dribbled
on it and runned away with it and tried to keep it for her own!
Eventually, we all got a chance to play with it, but only after Millie
was blissed on the catnip whiffies!

But friends, the crowning glory was the lovely foods in there! We got
what we think is freeze dried raw which we all go bananas for, and we
got some yummy dry foods too that we've been having when we've been
extra good. Our human laughs at us cuz she says we think this
complete, good for you cat food is a treaty! But we know better. We
know it's a good for you cat food, not a treaty, but let me tell you
something, friends, it tastes so good that it's a good for you cat
food and a treaty all in one! And that's special! There's not many
good for you cat foods that are that good, we can tell you!

Our Secret Paw was also kind enough to include a little gift for the
human, a gorgeous tube of wafer thin, melt in your mouth cineamon
cookies which my human absolutely fell in love with! We tried to steal
some, but she wouldn't let us have any, not even Apache, who tried
ever so hard! She did give her the empty tube to play with though, so
it wasn't all bad.

So, to our Secret Paw sender, we'd like to say a huge, huge thank you
so much! We're sending loads of head bumpies and kissies your way, and
if you'd like to tell us who you are, then we'd be all the more glad
for it! Thank you so, so much for such an amazing present that we love
so much that our human actually has to hide the toys away from us to
stop us loving them so hard that we ruin them! And to stop Apache
stealing the catnip mousie that she thinks belongs only to her! We're
sorry that it took us so long to tell you it had got here, but we're
glad to be back!

So, friends, our Christmouse came late, but boy was it worth waiting
for! Soon, we'll tell you all about what we've been up to in the last
few months, and we'll also tell you who this Apache person is!... Come
back soon!